Never Ask a Man What He Thinks About You
His name was Fred. My aunt hooked us up on a blind date. He was tall and handsome. It’s always the cute ones that end up being weird. He was in his 30s but had a bullshit job. He lived in a sparsely furnished studio apartment. He refused to eat vegetables and threw out pennies.
Yes, it soon became clear that this man wasn’t the one but he did offer up one of the best pieces of dating advice that I still adhere to.
We were out to dinner when I asked what he thought about my outfit.
Fred: You look great but I’m going to tell you something my mother told me. Don’t ask a man what he thinks about your hair, clothes, makeup, etc.
Fred: You have to understand the way men think. Once you ask a man to give his opinion you open up a door that you can never close again. He will continue to give his opinion even when you don’t ask and chances are you won’t like what he has to say.
SG: So I should never ask what a man thinks?
Fred: Just don’t ask him what he thinks about something you are sensitive about.
SG: How will I know if a man likes the way I look?
Fred: We’ll tell you, “Babe, I like that dress on you.”
SG: And if you don’t like something?
Fred: Men operate on extremes. Either you look so amazing that we have to tell you or you look fool and we have to let it be known so that you don’t make us look bad. If you are somewhere in the middle, chances are he won’t say anything.
From that moment forth, my approach to holding a conversation with a man I’m dating was forever changed.
Women tend to think that asking a man what he thinks is a way to bring the two of them closer. In actuality, a woman badgers a man about their opinion in order to feed her own insecurities. Women need to hear things even if it’s something they already know to be true.
The problem with her asking questions is that he isn’t going to want to lie. Men can’t lie about certain stuff (except for cheating) especially to a woman they care about so stop asking if you look fat in your jeans when you know you had to lie on the bed to get them on. Don’t ask him if he likes your new hair. Let him notice it on his own. Basically what Fred taught me was: Women, stop fishing for compliments because there’s a good chance when you throw the line into the water, you aren’t going to like what comes back on the hook.
- Says the Single Girl