The Dirty, Stinking (Possibly Rotten) Truth
Manny has a problem.
He likes this girl but there’s one thing that is keeping him from going forward with her…wait for it…her vagina smells.
Manny describes her pre-shower odor as a mean combo of ass and fish. Post shower, Manny was puzzled to find that there was still an order. This time she smelled like “drool.”
“Drool?” I asked
“Yeah, like spit. I like my pussy like I like my Dove soap…unscented.”
I really felt for Manny, he is a great guy. Tall, dark and handsome. Smart, hella funny and talented. It just so happens that he is also super picky so whenever I hear that he’s dismissed a women it often is due to the silliest of things.
“She lives to far and doesn’t have a car.”
“She’s too light.”
“I know her friends.”
“She smokes cigarettes.”
This Manny is also the one who was the inspiration behind the “If Jesus Could Wife a Whore, Why Can’t You Wife a Lady with a Baby?”
I’ve been hearing about Ms. Smelly Snatch for weeks now. The topic always starts with her being at his place, them getting touchy feely and he not being about to seal the deal cause the first whiff of her makes him go limp.
She’s really feeling him and wants to know why he always flicks the “off” switch when they’re on the verge of getting it on.
“She wants to know why I’m not feeling her,” he tells me.
“What did you say?”
“I told her that I was always on the fence about us and just think we would be better suited as friends.”
“Really? You made all that up instead of telling her that her pussy smells.”
“You think I should tell her!”
“Hell yeah, tell her. She needs to know. Either she has a hygiene problem or a medical problem. Sit her stinking ass down and tell her the truth. You could be saving her life.”
“So, say I tell her and then what? I have to look her in the face.”
“Manny, you have to an adult on this one. Man up.”
“I don’t understand how telling a girl her pussy stinks is manning up.”
As adults, there comes a time when we must be the barer of bad news and say the things that no one wants to hear, but needs to. Telling someone you are interested in that they smell not only helps you out, it helps them. Of course no woman wants to hear that her cat trap really smells like cat. No man wants to hear that his dick is small either, but the truth is the truth.
In Manny’s case, he’s dealing (notice the tense is current cause he hasn’t told her yet) with a woman who otherwise was in the running for something more.
“She’s mad cool. I thought could see where it goes but now I can’t get past that smell.”
“What if you tell her, she gets checked out and takes care of the smell; would you think about sticking around then?”
“No. I can’t.”
“It might come back.”