SATC Has Ruined Your Dating Life


This weekend I had the pleasure of watching the Sex and the City feature film for the first time. It wasn’t a pleasure because of the film itself but because of the company I was in. An opinionated, Mr. Big-hating, Aidan-loving, heterosexual man, who paused the film throughout to blast the character’s decisions and reiterate his points.

“See, that’s what Carrie’s dumb ass gets for leaving Aidan for [Big]. She left a good guy and got left at the altar!”

What followed was a ten-minute back and forth about why women would take the man who can say “I got this” over the one who says “I need you”. I argued that women want to be taken care of. Some would prefer to marry a man they know will take care of home over one who will love them unconditionally but can’t manage a mortgage. The worst feeling in the world for a woman is to discover that she wears the pants in her relationship.

Fellas, please don’t misconstrue this with her being a gold digger. You don’t have to be a millionaire but you do have to show the self-determination and drive to make ends meets without question each month, year, etc. A woman wants to be secure in knowing she is with someone who won’t fail her.

But this is stuff I’ve already covered. The real story is how Sex and the City has f*cked up millions of women.

Dare I say it, Sex and the City has done more damage to the woman’s psyche, than Steve Harvey’s book, any Tyla Purry film, Essence/Cosmo magazine and The Rules combined.


Women think that Sex and the City is real! It’s kinda like Linus and the Great Pumpkin. Women of all ages and races believe that Mr. Big is going to rise like a savior, from the crowded rush-hours streets or order her and all of her girlfriends a drink at some after work event.

Let’s call it the Sex and the City Syndrome.

Just like every man wishes his d*ck was 12-inches long and he would sleep with Beyonce, Jessica Beal and Cassie all in the same night, every woman wishes she lived the life of a SATC character.

I wish someone would take an unofficial survey of the number of women who moved to NYC in hopes of falling of love (like J.Hud’s blah character) and having a fabu wardrobe as they prance across the city after seeing SATC.

In my opinion the realest character is Mr. Big. I know several men like him. Ladies, you do not want this man! If you think Carrie waiting 10 years to get married to Big was played up for the film, think again. Men like Mr. Big aren’t going to jump into a marriage, hell, they barely want to claim a woman as their girlfriend and only do it when it becomes unavoidable. You keep bringing the same cute woman to work functions, the fellas in the firm are going to start wanting answers.

Big-type-men have a hard time trusting women. Do ladies love them for them or the money they have? Valid question when you consider we are in a recession and they know you watch SATC no matter how much you downplay its trance over you.

If I hear another woman refer to herself or her friends as any of the show’s character I will throw up and not just in my mouth. Little kids have Mickey Mouse and Disneyland, a world of make-believe that pleasures them beyond compare. Grown women have Carrie Bradshaw and Sex and the City, a over-stylized, fantasy-filled depiction of a city that in real life is one of the worst cities to meet, date and marry someone.

FYI…I’m a mixture of Carrie and Samantha.

- SG

10 Responses to “SATC Has Ruined Your Dating Life”

  1. You’re friend is right. Carrie is a dumbass. Her, and every woman out there like her, has the misconception that the cocky, self-made, rich guy will “take care” of them . And they are horribly wrong. The one who will take care of her is the one who cares about her.

    You do sum up Mr. Big quite nicely at the end of this piece though. It almost sounds as if you contradict yourself from how you make the argument with your friend.

    Yes, I’m a little bitter about this. Thank you.


  2. d’oh! “YOUR friend is right…”


  3. i drank that sweet kool-aid as a young(er) 20-something. but especially after watching the movie, i detoxed. really disappointing. shoulda let sleeping dogs lie (on many levels).

    you ain’t lie…ladies, don’t believe the hype. self-absorbed arrogance is out!

  4. I think that it is a very interesting and amusing article. Practically all its main points are true.

  5. If you ever want to hear a reader’s feedback :) , I rate this article for four from five. Decent info, but I have to go to that damn yahoo to find the missed pieces. Thank you, anyway!

  6. I think what it comes down to is a woman’s ability to discern fantasy from reality! Sure, I completely identify myself as a Carrie/Samantha blend (lol), and I’ll be damned if they didn’t pull some of Carrie’s love affairs (specifically her and Big’s) out of my own life story! However, I’m not so deluded as to ever think that MY “Big” will ever get his ish together enough to recognize the err of his ways and re-sweep me off my feet like Carrie’s did. Sad, but true. Also, one critique I must make is that, in my opinion, Carrie’s need to leave Aidan was more for lack of compatibility, than it was for a need for someone (i.e. Big) to take care of her. Granted, a man like Big may not be the smartest choice for a woman, but aren’t all good relationships built on the foundation of two people who are on the same page as each other? Settling for the “good man” who bores the shit out of you just doesn’t sound like my idea of a good time…

  7. satc is playing with one of the oldest relationship concepts there is and carrie is just a parody of naive college girls.

    satc splits the roles:
    miranda being the mother,
    charlotte being the virgin and
    sam being the wh*re

    …for carrie she is what we all want deep down ever since we’ver heared our first fairy-tale – shes the princess. look at the dress she wears in the opening sequence…

  8. ha I agree with Shadiddy!
    and completely disagree with bplease!

    Carrie was hardly the princess. Although she did play more the part of “gatherer” with her mass collection of blaniks.

  9. Blah Blah Blah… Enough. Mr. Big is the guy that all ladies want …. Big in the pockets and in the pants. Those that deny this are lying to themselves. All men want a combination of Miranda being the mother, and Sam being the sexually uninhabited Goddess in Bed. The virgin thing is gone forever due to woman’s Lib and the fact that women do not believe in being virtuous anymore. They want to be taken care of instead of being ah help mate…ah partner…ah best friend and that is really sad. Until that changes women will continue to whine and cry about the how a Mr. Big got their goods and bounced lol.

  10. I just discovered your blog and your take on the movie and show is hilarious. I admit I was caught up in the madness of SATC. Everything would stop when it was on HBO. I even fell in love with NYC because of it. Nonetheless, the movie sucked , and I’ll be damned if I wait on any man for 10 freaking years. SATC was fantasy at its best. No one I know dates that much, has sex that much,(well maybe one person) or has that mnay shoes. Loved the show, but the movie should have never been made. The way it ended on HBO was perfection.( I am a mix of all 4 characters BTW.)!!

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